faith in action

A Home in the Wilderness

From the Desk of Susan Henry-Crowe


A few weeks ago, I accepted a Lenten invitation offered on Ash Wednesday:

This is a season of penitence and fasting…. It was also a time when those who, because of notorious sins, had been separated from the body of the faithful were reconciled by penitence and forgiveness, and restored to the fellowship of the Church. Thereby, the whole congregation was put in mind of the message of pardon and absolution set forth in the Gospel of our Savior, and of the need which all Christians continually have to renew their repentance and faith.

UM Book of Worship

Here is a confession: Since the outbreak of COVID-19, I have not attended to anything that feels like a Holy Lent. I have not fasted. I have eaten chocolate (which I usually set aside). I have prayed very feebly alone or online. Rarely have I been present among a beloved community gathered in person. I have not sung many of my favorite Lenten hymns. I have only received Communion twice.

When I consider the new rhythms of daily life brought on by this pandemic, I am heartened by acts of patience and grace extended, and yet simultaneously I feel a sense of dislocation, restlessness and discontent. Just underneath the surface is a deep sense of unknowing.

The expansiveness of COVID-19 is like being lost in a vast wilderness.

My worst camping experience was in the middle of North Carolina’s Pisgah National Forest in the pouring rain with a group of twelve-year-olds. We did not know where we were nor how long the onslaught of storms would last. When you try to sleep in that kind of situation you are overcome with every imaginable thought and fear.

So here we are in a wilderness of anxiety and fear.

People who are already living in conditions of poverty and on the margins of health and life are even more vulnerable. Those released from prison are faced with questions of where to go. For those facing domestic violence and abuse, a house is not safe and certainly not a place to call home. Still others fear racist smears and xenophobic responses from their neighbors. Meanwhile, many of our leaders stubbornly continue their wholesale commitments to big business and the wealthy to the detriment of the most vulnerable in our communities.

I am not sure that worry and anxiety are Lenten practices.

However, with God’s grace, anxiety and worry can lead to repentance. We can turn around from greed and selfish ways of living to standing and advocating with those for whom Jesus cared and died. Systems of injustice can change when we work and commit ourselves.

Beneath the cross of Jesus I fain would take my stand,
The shadow of a mighty rock within a weary land;
A home within the wilderness a rest upon the way,
From the burning of the noontide heat, and the burden of the day.


UMH 297, Elizabeth C. Clephane, 1872

So this has not been a very satisfying Lent, but perhaps it leads us to a home within the wilderness.